Category Archives: Luke R. E. Publican

Swiss Minaretxia

Immigration Issues, Islam in Europe, Islamophobia 101, Luke R. E. Publican, Terrorism Issue


Cows will no longer give milk in Switzerland if minarets are allowed to stand.

The rightwing political parties in Switzerland are up in arms, preparing for a vote on Sunday to save their alpine paradise from the dreaded cultural eyesore of mosque minarets. This proposed ban on minarets comes from the same friendly yodelers in the nationalist Swiss People’s Party that has previously campaigned against foreigners, including a proposal to kick out entire families of foreigners if one of their children breaks a law and a bid to subject citizenship applications to a popular vote. But they have the pure white chocolate science to back up their campaign this time. It is now evident from a pretentious hypothetical analysis that purebred Swiss cows refuse to give milk, even 1 percent, when they see a minaret. This spells the end of Swiss milk chocolate, a loss that would udderly ruin the Swiss economy, not to mention the sense of shame the bovine residents of the country would feel.

Save Switzerland for the pure Swiss, those wily Swiss Bankers who for decades have allowed brutal dictators to launder their money in untouchable Swiss bank accounts. Continue reading Swiss Minaretxia →

At least it wasn’t pork

Food and Drink, Luke R. E. Publican, YouTube Watch


Sacred meat with name of Allah from Nigerian restaurant

Gullibility may be the most common human trait. The West has its UFOs and citings of Elvis, following medieval Christian crusades to find the true cross and holy grail. Indeed, even the prepuce of the Messiah (venerated in the church on January 1) shares space in almost two dozen cathedrals. It is reported (the kind that Fox News might report) that on Christmas day in 800 AD the about-to-be-crowned Charlemagne gave a part of the foreskin of Christ to Pope Leo III. Charlemagne said he received it from an angel, but others say it was a wedding gift from the Byzantine Empress Irene. One wonders who spirited the bit of divine flesh out of the stable in Bethlehem and saved it for a future queen.

All three monotheisms posit signs from Yahweh, the Triune God or Allah. The Virgin Mary or even the head of Jesus may appear on a piece of toast, as though God blesses the bread we eat only if it can take the heat. Islam, unfortunately, is not immune from calligraphic appearances in the most mundane places. Less than a year ago, the Arabic name Allah, appeared on several pieces of meat in a Nigerian restaurant. Alhamdillah, it was beef. But as a sign of hard times, it was not a prime rib or filet mignon (which would have been far too much Western cuisine, I think), but gristle. “When the writings were discovered there were some Islamic scholars who come and eat here and they all commented that it was a sign to show that Islam is the only true religion for mankind,” claimed the restaurant owner. The more appropriate response might be: fat chance. Continue reading At least it wasn’t pork →

Blessed are the Peacemakers?

Bible and Holy Land, Iraq War, Islam and Christianity, Luke R. E. Publican

The Bible is a big book with plenty of quotations for politicians and other enemies of clear thinking. Thomas Jefferson came up with his abridged Bible based solely on the Gospels. He saw value in the ethics but not much in the legal wrangling and superstitions. Now it appears that former Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld took the opposite approach, striking out the blessed beatitudes like “Blessed are the peacemakers” (Matthew 5:9) and “love your enemies” (Matthew 5:44). Who needs that when there is all that hellfire and brimstone and enemy bashing early on? Apparently not Mr. Rumsfeld, nor his adoring boss, Mr. Bush.

It appears that even though the Defense Secretary was not very adept at devising a plan for post-war Iraq security, he did know a thing or two about Photoshop. You can see a slide show of the illustrated covers of his “Worldwide Intelligence Update” (oxymoron that it was) on the GQ website. It is not hard to see why it was given “no distribution” classification. Continue reading Blessed are the Peacemakers? →

Pay Dirt for the RNC

Arab-Israeli Conflict, Election 2008, Luke R. E. Publican, Palestine, Terrorism Issue


Where the RNC found Joe the Plumber

Yesterday the RNC (also to be known as Really Nasty Condemnations) slid out yet more mud trying to fearmonger Senator Obama yet again as a terrorist. Since they cannot find any smoking guns from Obama’s record, the exit strategy has come down to throwing smoke-filled room stink bombs around Obama’s Chicago neighborhood. The latest mudpie comes at the expense of Professor Rashid Khalidi, who holds the Edward Said Chair of History at Columbia University. When Obama taught at the University of Chicago he was a colleague, neighbor and friend of Khalidi. For the RNC all it takes to be labeled terrorist these days is to be Palestinian. But they have chosen an individual who is a recognized international scholar and who is admired across a broad spectrum of the academy. His most recent book, The Iron Cage, attacks the excesses of Zionism on the Palestinian quest for statehood, but is also critical of the PLO and Palestinian violence. He writes as a historian, not a polemicist only interested in political spin. Continue reading Pay Dirt for the RNC →

In Jesus’ Name?

Apocalypse Watch, Election 2008, Luke R. E. Publican

As I write this, being Sunday, I have no doubt that we could wipe out the National Debt and bail out every Wall Street firm if we only had a dollar for each time someone recited “in Jesus’ name” today alone. Since Jesus has not yet returned (or surely Pat Robertson would have told us), there is no end of WWJD speculation over this election. In some parts of this country there is an idea that being Christian is the same as being Republican. Blessed are those who smear the character of their opponents: that’s what the Bible ought to say, according to Karl Rove. In the nation’s tightening Bible Belt there are those who think a Christian should never vote for a democrat, as though politics can be read the same way as apocalypse. So it should not be a surprise that the vitriolic rhetoric of Sarah Palin results in the kind of hate speech that makes Obama the same as Osama and rekindles the kind of KKK racism that used to lynch “uppity” black folk. Not long ago a black man could be beaten to death simply for daring to vote, so imagine how grating it must be to the kind of racists who are scared a black man might actually president. Didn’t God curse Ham?

There is no question that prayer is a much better option for this campaign than the hate speech heard at Palin and McCain rallies during the past week. But then, as the country song reminds us, be careful what you pray for. On Sunday at a McCain event in Davenport, Iowa, the crowd was warmed up by a local pastor of the Evangelical Free Church. Here was his prayer, as reported by a blogger at the event:

“There are plenty of people around the world who are praying to their god, be they Hindu, Buddah, or Allah, that (McCain’s) opponent wins. I pray that you step forward and honor your own name.” Ends with “in Jesus’ name.”

Continue reading In Jesus’ Name? →

The Great Chain of Being Racist

Election 2008, Islamophobia, Journalism and Media, Luke R. E. Publican, Terrorism Issue

Let’s start with the Bible. “Whatsoever a man soweth,” says the King James Version, “that shall he shall reap.” I doubt the Apostle Paul would mind if this verse was clarified for 2008 as “Whatsoever a politician sayeth, that shall he also reap bigtime.” For the past week, as Wall Street was dodging fire and brimstone economic news, the McCain/Palin campaign let loose the doggone attack dog one-liners, claiming that Obama was “pallin’ with terrorists,” mocking the idea of an American with a middle name of Hussein, and asking rhetorically “Who is Barack Obama?” For the vast undercurrent of racist attitudes in America this was red heifer meat, fear mongering in raw form. So who do at least a few (and it seems more than a few) of those listening to McCain and Palin think Senator Obama is? Why, he’s an Arab, of course.

To his credit, John McCain stepped back from the flames of the fire he himself set and set the record straight that his opponent is a “decent man” and a family man and not a scary man. To his discredit, this racist comment is the logical conclusion of many who have listened to his “I am John McCain and I approve this ad” campaign spin. While the government was scrambling to bail out the major financial institutions, in some of the redder side roads off Main Street the Straight Talk Express was spewing out Rove-driven poisonous carbon-copy monoxide. Continue reading The Great Chain of Being Racist →

Holy Moses, Palin’s in the Torah

Apocalypse Watch, Election 2008, Luke R. E. Publican

The choice of Alaska Governor Sarah Palin to be the one-heartbeat-away running mate for Republican John McCain was not just throwing another hat into the political ring. No, this was a hunk of red meat, Red Heifer over moose flesh, for the hungry religious right to savor. Here was a born-again Pentecostal who overnight transformed the gambling non-Christian (just ask James Dobson before the epiphany) Navy war hero into a respectable church elder. The apocalyptic baggage of Palin’s Assemby of God church raised more than a few eyebrows outside the red-faced Bible Belt. If she became Vice-President (or President) would God finally let Satan unleash the Tribulation, killing off hundreds of thousands of Jews and millions of unborn-again Americans? What better place to hold out in caves and read those KJV blood-soaked Bibles than in Alaska, where the remaining believers could actually see Gog across the Being Strait? If Sarah Palin’s oil pipeline, like the Iraq War, was something the Redneck State God wanted, then surely Senator Obama is a perfect fit for the Antichrist.

But wait, it gets better than what the Prophet Daniel had to say about the Day of Jacob’s Trouble and the Apostle Paul predicted so rapturously about the Second Coming of Jesus. Now we know that Sarah Palin got onto the GOP ticket because it was predicted in the Torah. Move over De Vinci and make room for Josephus. Here is what the Ark of the Covenant Code says abut Election o8: Continue reading Holy Moses, Palin’s in the Torah →