“Burn, baby, burn.” One might expect these words to come from a comedian as much as an arsonist. If you put the name “Terry Jones” into Google you will find a comedian. That is Terence Graham Parry Jones of Monty Python fame. These days there is another Terry Jones, a “Rev.ed” up one to boot. Rev. Terry Jones is the previously and foreseeably future little-known pastor of the Dove World Outreach Center on the outskirts of Gainesville, Florida. For a congregation estimated at about 50, their outreach may take a millennium or more, but they do have an inflammatory website, which promotes the “Right” (in all the irony this words entails) Rev. Jones’ book with the rather unoriginal title of “Islam is of the Devil,” which is for sale, as is a $20 t-shirt to advertise hatred of Islam. For an individual who has no clue about Islam, apart from his own rabid intolerance, the devil is certainly not in the details. His moment of fame is about to eclipse, but his motive is so shameful it deserves all the condemnation it can get, the kind in which the pen is mightier than the bonfire.

Let’s start with the desire to burn. One name should suffice to call out the hypocrisy of Mr. Jones. That name is John Wycliffe, the 14th century Christian cleric whose name inspired the Wycliffe Bible Translators, one of the most active Protestant organizations translating the Bible into other languages. Wycliffe dared to translate the Latin Vulgate into English, so earning the ire of the Catholic Pope that he was excommunicated. Some 44 years after Wycliffe died of a stroke, the “Church” had his bones dug up and burned, along with all his writings. I suspect that Jones prefers the King James Version of the Bible, although I do not know if he is aware that this “authorized” version was greatly influenced by Wycliffe.

There are two lessons here for Jones and those who want to be intolerant like the Joneses. First, burning bodies and books is a tactic long carried out by Christians against fellow Christians. I believe that Jones would side with Wycliffe and condemn the Catholic church (no doubt accepting the rival fundamentalist claim that Catholicism is of the Devil). Had Jones preached his gospel at the time of Wycliffe, he too would have been thrown into the bonfire of an intolerant religious bigotry. Second, it never works. Those Christians called of the Lord to burn Beatles’ albums (all that Satanic rock and roll) in the 1960s did not knock the “Hey Jude” group off the top-ten charts.

Jones is not entirely looney; he is perspicacious enough to issue the following disclaimer (not even in fine print) on his website:

Let’s just make one thing clear. A small church, in a small town, down a back road, burning copies of its own books, on its own property, is not responsible for the violent actions anyone may take in retaliation to our protest. Remember, Paul did not make the snake, the fire drove it out and he was bitten. If violence happens in reaction to this, the violence was not caused by us, it has just been exposed.

The only thing being exposed in this logic is the stupidity of the person saying it. I am not sure this logic has chapter and verse in the gospel, although it goes along well with the sentiment in Deuteronomy 22:28-29. If Jones wants to emulate Christ and throw the moneychangers out of the temple, then go to Saudi Arabia and knock on the door of Alwaleed Bin Talal, the second largest owner of Fox News. But let’s twist the analogy a little: “Remember, Paul did not make his male member erect, the hot pants on the young girl drove it out and he was smitten. If rape happens in reaction to this, the rape was not caused by Paul who had no choice but to expose himself.” This might make an interesting story for a sermon on Matthew 5:28.

Fire begets fire. Burn a Quran to get coverage in the New York Post and on Fox News (both owned by the same less than divine mogul) and the lives of all Americans overseas in Islamic countries are for sure put in jeopardy. I can understand that Jones would not listen to advice from Hillary Clinton, but it appears that Rev. Jones does not support General Petraeus either. Here is the likely chain reaction: burn a Qur’an, create yet another terrorist.

So is it possible to bring sanity to a man who thinks he has been called upon by “his” God to spit fire in the faces of other folks’ God? Since the horseshit has already been let out of the barn, it may not even matter. The very fact that he would threaten to do so will no doubt incite violence. But I have a suggestion and it is a prophetic one right out of the Bible. Turn to I Kings 18 and read the story of Elijah and the prophets of Baal. Here it is in the inspired KJV:

20 So Ahab sent unto all the children of Israel, and gathered the prophets together unto mount Carmel.
21 And Elijah came unto all the people, and said, How long halt ye between two opinions? if the LORD be God, follow him: but if Baal, then follow him. And the people answered him not a word.
22 Then said Elijah unto the people, I, even I only, remain a prophet of the LORD; but Baal’s prophets are four hundred and fifty men.
23 Let them therefore give us two bullocks; and let them choose one bullock for themselves, and cut it in pieces, and lay it on wood, and put no fire under: and I will dress the other bullock, and lay it on wood, and put no fire under:
24 And call ye on the name of your gods, and I will call on the name of the LORD: and the God that answereth by fire, let him be God. And all the people answered and said, It is well spoken.

Rev. Jones would probably have no problem identifying King Ahab with former President Bill Clinton (since they would both be married to Jezebels in his dhimmiwitted eyesight). So let several Qur’ans be placed on the front lawn of his church. He is welcome to put as much kindling as he desires underneath. Then invite a Muslim imam and ask him to go first. I guarantee the Muslim will say “This is my holy book, just as you have a holy book that I would not disrespect because I also accept Jesus as a prophet sent by Allah.” So he will not call upon “his” God to commit an act of sacrilege. Then let Rev. Jones deliver the most powerful, hellfired-up prayer he has ever done and ask “his” God to send down fire from heaven and consume those Qur’ans. It certainly worked for Elijah, a Jewish prophet, because a lot of people would say God was on his side. So, Rev. Jones, I suggest you go for it and burn all your bridges. Since “your” God has called on you to do this, how can “your God” forsake you?

Daniel Martin Varisco

Posted as well on History News Network.