Category Archives: Humor and Satire

Cavorting with Cazotte #1

The name Jacques Cazotte may not ring many bells these days. After all, he died in 1792, a victim of the success of the French Revolution, but probably not because he was into the Illuminati… But fans of Oriental tales imitating the famous Arabian Nights may recognize his name. In 1742 he published Mille et une fadaises, Contes a dormir debout (The Thousand and One Follies, Tales to Sleep Upright), which was later translated into English. The English edition published in the year of his death is available in that magical resource for book lovers: archive.org. There are several volumes, but I have chosen an excerpt about Habib the knight from volume 3. Enjoy.

to be continued (just like the 1001 Nights…)

Comment peut-on être Persan?


The French savant and satirist Charles-Louis de Secondat, better known as Baron Montesquieu penned his Lettres Persanes in 1721, almost three centuries ago. This was long before the age of computers or the idea that eventually germinated in the head of Steve Jobs and blossomed into the Mac (and I do not mean the big kind you eat). I suspect that Montesquieu wrote by candle light with a quill for a pen, but he would have been delighted to type away on a Macbook, especially since it comes prepackaged with both a French keyboard and a Persian font. But, alas, poor Usbek and Rica would not be able to board an Air France flight to New York, connect to Atlanta and then walk into an Apple Store and buy a much smaller Air than the one they flew from Charles de Gaulle.

Shocking, is it not. But as Jamal Abdi writes in today’s New York Times, how to be a Persian has taken on new meaning in our globally-fixated-on-terrorism age:

Last month, Sahar Sabet, a 19-year-old Iranian-American woman, was improperly prevented from buying an iPad at an Apple store in Alpharetta, Ga. After she had gone over the various options with two Apple sales clerks, a third clerk, who had overheard Ms. Sabet speaking Persian to her uncle, intervened. He asked what language they were speaking and, when he found out it was the language of Iran, he said she could not buy anything because “our countries do not have good relations” — never mind that she intended to give it to her sister in North Carolina.

Of course, Montesquieu himself could walk into Le Apple Store in Paris and come out high on his own Airs. So I can only wonder what he might have added in the new updated version of Le emails persane. Perhaps it would go like this: Continue reading Comment peut-on être Persan?

The 8th Voyage of Sindbad: #5


The Third Voyage of Sinbad, by Charles Robinson (1870 – 1937)

[Webshaykh’s Note: This last semester I taught an Honors Seminar on the Arabian Nights. The last assignment asked students to write the 8th voyage of Sindbad, drawing on what happened in earlier voyages. I will post several of these here for your enjoyment. This is the fifth one I am publishing by Becky Cuthbertson The fourth is by Mahmoud Abdelaziz. The third is by Peter Otis. The second is by Marissa Priest. For the first by Taryn Teurfs, click here.]

The Eighth Voyage of Sindbad the Sailor
by Becky Cuthbertson

For many years after his seventh journey, my father Sindbad the Sailor stayed at home, resuming his former lifestyle. He was joyous at my birth and that of my sister’s. We lead a life of indulgence and happiness; we had all the luck in the world. Many years later, my father sat at home with his wife, my mother, by the fire; they watched my sister and I play. He thought that it was a shame that my sister and I would never meet our grandfather; my parents fled my grandfather’s great city where men turn into birds and my father swore never to sail again. Smiling at my mother, he announced that we were journeying to see our grandfather; we were sailing next week.

My mother looked at him curiously, “Husband, have you not sworn to never sail the seas again?”

He smiled broadly, “Yes my dear but I shall press my luck one more time; I am not sailing for excitement or adventure but to visit family. Allah should not begrudge me that.”

So the following week we set off, sailing to find the city of my grandfather. A few days out to sea, a storm hit. The ship was rolling, rain down pouring, and wind gusts pitched the ship from side to side, almost capsizing us several times. All of us prayed to the Almighty God to protect us, save us, and deliver us from harm while the crew worked to stabilize the ship. Lightening began to strike off in the distance, but at every crash, a bolt loomed nearer and nearer. The captain bolted down below and brought up with him chalk. Murmuring to himself, he began to draw patterns all along the rails.

“Captain,” my father called, “why are you drawing with chalk all over the ship?” Continue reading The 8th Voyage of Sindbad: #5

Power corrupts and corrupts


Yemen Press is reporting that they have uncovered documentation that the head of military finances in Yemen from 1998-2009, ‘Abd al-Mun‘im al-AdÄ«mÄ«, appropriated about 281 million riyals for his own use during the Salih regime. As his name suggests, he was indeed a slave to the role of benefactor, but not in the hallowed religious sense. Such corruption is not unique to Yemen, as dictators and monarchs do the same all the time. Power corrupts, as it has since records have been kept. The political cartoon accompanying the article speaks for itself…

The 8th Voyage of Sindbad: #4


Sinbad the Sailor by Nadir Quinto (1918-1994), an Italian artist, born in Milan

The Eighth Voyage of Sindbad
bu Mahmoud Abdelaziz

[Webshaykh’s Note: This last semester I taught an Honors Seminar on the Arabian Nights. The last assignment asked students to write the 8th voyage of Sindbad, drawing on what happened in earlier voyages. I will post several of these here for your enjoyment. This is the fourth one I am publishing by Mahmoud Abdelaziz. The third is by Peter Otis. The second is by Marissa Priest. For the first by Taryn Teurfs, click here.]

{Sindbad the Porter said to Sindbad the Sailor, “For God’s sake, pardon me the wrong I did you,” and they continued to enjoy their fellowship and friendship, in all cheer and joy, until there came to them death, the destroyer of delights, sunderer of companies, wrecker of palaces, and builder of tombs (The Seventh Voyage of Sindbad)}.

Angels with black faces descended from the heavens carrying rough haircloth and sat around Sindbad the Sailor in throngs stretching as far as the eye can see. Sindbad’s entire body was paralyzed with fear, including his vocal cords, which he could not get to vibrate in the least in order to make even the slightest utterance. Then the Angel of Death came and sat at his head and said, “Foul soul, come out to the wrath and anger of Allah!” Then his soul divided up in his body and it was dragged out like a skewer is pulled out of wet wool. Sindbad screeched in torment from the excruciating pain of his soul’s inertial desire to remain in his body clinging to this world. Then the Angel took hold of it. When he had grasped it, the other angels did not leave it in his hand even for the twinkling of an eye. They took it and wrapped it in the rough haircloth and a stench came out of it like the worst stench of a corpse on the face of the earth.

Then they took it up and whenever they took it past a company of angels, they asked, “Who is this foul soul?” and the angels with the soul replied, “Sindbad the Sailor, son of Sindbad the revered Imam of Baghdad, father of Sindbad the acclaimed doctor of all the orient—” But before Sindbad’s soul could feel even a modicum of pride, the angels continued, using the worst names by which people used to call him in this world—“slave to his own desires, worshipper of the dunya, the self-indulgent Sindbad the Sailor who had forsaken his family to pursue his own selfish interests.” Upon hearing his own atrocities and misdeeds, Sindbad’s soul began weeping with guilt and regret. The angels brought him to the lowest heaven and asked for the gate to be opened for him. It did not open. As verse forty of chapter seven of the Holy Qur’an, the Divine Guidance for mankind, reads:

To those who reject Our signs and treat them with arrogance,
No opening will there be of the gates of heaven,
Nor will they enter the garden,
Until the camel can pass through the eye of the needle:
Such is Our reward for those in sin.

Continue reading The 8th Voyage of Sindbad: #4

The 8th Voyage of Sinbad: #3


Sinbad the Sailor by Nadir Quinto (1918-1994), an Italian artist, born in Milan

[Webshaykh’s Note: This last semester I taught an Honors Seminar on the Arabian Nights. The last assignment asked students to write the 8th voyage of Sindbad, drawing on what happened in earlier voyages. I will post several of these here for your enjoyment. This is the third one I am publishing by Peter Otis. The second is by Marissa Priest. For the first by Taryn Teurfs, click here.]


The Eighth Voyage of Sinbad: The Isle of the Lost Civilization

by Peter Otis

And Scheherazade said, it is recounted, your grace, of how Sinbad the Sailor invited the Porter back the following evening, and told the tale of his magnificent eighth voyage:

My friends, I tell you that in turbulent times, the fortunes of all men and creatures in God’s creation are scattered like sand in a torrent, and that fate holds unpredictable odds in store. Truly, as I recounted to you yesterday evening, my seventh voyage was the final of my audacious journeys on the vast and distant seas on the outer rim of the world. Of course, you know from my voyages of my immeasurable wealth. However, you know not that the vast fortunes that surround you this evening would not be, were it not for my eighth and final voyage! On my journey back to Baghdad from my seventh adventure, I was wracked with a deep sense of despair to learn in Basra that civil war had erupted between the Caliph’s two sons, whose greedy rage had resulted in the devastation of my beloved Baghdad! Surely, my friends, the destruction is all too fresh in your minds as well. I returned in horror to find Baghdad in ruin, and to little surprise my own wealth stored at my palace had been plundered amid the turmoil. What precious wealth I had brought back with me from my seventh voyage I gave to the city’s keepers to finance reconstruction and the care of invalids. Give alms according to God’s will, for truly, only God in his goodness is eternal, while the aspirations of man and his pride are reduced to dust! Heartbroken to see the object of my desire—my beloved city—ruptured in such a way, I returned to my true home the sea, and left Baghdad almost as quickly as I had returned to her. Continue reading The 8th Voyage of Sinbad: #3